Brian Caron @acornbrain.bsky.social

Un-fluencer. Mostly harmless
Just me: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:lcmic7aufmdzn4fdxtclgowv/feed/aaaknv3nrggu4

Sometimes I paint:
www.briancaron.com

It's a shame I abandoned years worth of hilarious jokes over on Twitter. Don't go and check, just trust me on this. Hilarious.
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open.spotify.com/track/3bwhk92jFSSNL8DsQSjb1P?si=d8b5QfmYRwe_XrZfa73mHw
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Glorious day on the porch. Two more beers and the music shares begin
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Reposted by Brian Caron
porktartare.bsky.social's profile picture
Unemployed Guy @porktartare.bsky.social
16h
For Whom the Bell Bivs
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I only have a couple of phone numbers memorized anymore, so if I'm ever in trouble, I can either call my wife's cell, or my deceased grandmother's former land line.
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Reposted by Brian Caron
danglinghemmie.bsky.social's profile picture
skΓ‘ld @danglinghemmie.bsky.social
19h
yeah, we actually called the school of hard knocks and they can't find you in their records
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I think some people follow me out of pity AND I'LL TAKE IT
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On Easter, I really like to ham it up, oh crap too late dang it
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when the movie pulp fiction came out, we were all running around, jamming hypodermic syringes into each other's chests. "we're playing pulp fiction!" we'd yell to our concerned parents. those were the days of our lives.
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cyberpunk has had its run now it's time for cyberska give me robot rudeboys and augmentations that turn your hands into trombones
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It’s not my fault your grandma’s bad at karate
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One metric shit ton is equal to 0.6214 English shit tonnes (or do I have that backwards?)
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@cosmicclau.bsky.social
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When a world map is published in Australia, do they put Australia right in the middle, or do they stick it in the bottom -right corner like everybody else does?
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Reposted by Brian Caron
pleasebegneiss.bsky.social's profile picture
slate @pleasebegneiss.bsky.social
7d
disciples: we thought they killed you

jesus, dark and grittier, can say fuck: i got picked up by hbo max
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*sigh* I suppose I should "get dressed" and "change my t-shirt" that I've been wearing for "three days"
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Reposted by Brian Caron
galacticpotlady.bsky.social's profile picture
Wonder Jenny @galacticpotlady.bsky.social
7d
*feeds bluesky after midnight*
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Pete Hegseth has Max Headroom hair no further questions
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Reposted by Brian Caron
sireviscerate.myatproto.social's profile picture
Ray @sireviscerate.myatproto.social
7d
HER: Did you eat my Milk Duds?

ME: *silently chews for 7 minutes, finally swallows* first of all, i don't appreciate your accusations
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Why is it "liquid natural gas" and not just "natural liquid"?
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I can hear some commotion on my roof; please, please just be squirrels.
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MAKE FRIDAY GOOD AGAIN
is this anything?
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Reposted by Brian Caron
dak.myatproto.social's profile picture
Dak @dak.myatproto.social
8d
That time you saw only one set of footprints in the sand was when Jesus unfollowed you
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im ahead of my time. oops
it caught up. now im behind
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If you see this, post a concert photo you took:
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Reposted by Brian Caron
jilltwiss.bsky.social's profile picture
Jill Twiss @jilltwiss.bsky.social
13d
Ok step one is to make them look less delicious
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Sigh... this indispensable rectangle is going to be the death of me.
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My microplastics are achy today must be the rain
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