I hear so many autistics say they’re “bad at communication”

What we often mean is that we were never met halfway

We learned to translate ourselves again and again
and again without even knowing why

Until speaking felt like work instead of connection

This is so often pushing us to burnout.

April 11, 2026 - 09:32 UTC

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I think it's the NTs that are bad at communication. They don't just say things. They wrap it in layers of obfuscation and indirection. They assume everyone follows the same rules that they made up.
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This is true, but is it a feature of the English language? Do people who speak English as a second language share the same frustrations and do those with autism find that their use of language is far closer to others in countries like Germany and Netherlands, where people are naturally direct?
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The habit of reading what's not there used to drive me mad. When it finally happened in my closest circle with fatal consequences, some screw fell off my head and now I'm done caring. We have no control over delusions ppl have of us. It's their problem really, and I refuse to make it mine anymore.
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Seeing someone's face when this is understood tho, is amazing and heartbreaking.

Definitely harder for late-diagnosed autistics who just thought we were crap/challenging/weird all our lives.
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I don't believe we're 'bad at communication,' it's that NTs can't handle unfiltered truth.

I'm SOOO done playing their game & tell it like it is.

Gets me in trouble, but IDGAF anymore-they don't wanna hear unvarnished truth, they can block me!

DONE censoring myself for others 'sensitivities!'
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I'm happy to explain myself for any who wish to ask. Always.

But those who prefer to act like their lack of understanding automagically means I'm at fault? That the onus rests on me to attend their biases and preferences?

Tell you what, come on over and see how that works out for you.
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Me: works hard to make eye contact and the "i'm listening so hard" face, and respond in their preferred manner of speech and behavior

Them: still reacts with mild hostility, vague annoyance, and exasperation
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I communicate perfectly... but for some reason NTs read a load into what I say and project all sorts of emotional shit onto it!

How is 'have you seen my purse?' an accusation of theft? I want to know if you've seen it. If I was accusing you I'd say 'have you stolen my purse?'
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‘Have you seen my purse, by any chance?’ does not come across as an accusation, so maybe it is the perceived bluntness which leads to you being misunderstood. Germans and Dutch are very direct : I wonder if autistic people are less misunderstood in those countries.
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