robbwitmer @robbwitmer.info

You may remember me as the guy who jumps through the wedding cake in the Guns n’ Roses “November Rain” music video

► robbwitmer.info

“Okay I love the idea, but what if I do two thumbs-up so people know that I’m the star of the show”
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our new Destroy Everything Machine is nearly complete, which is great news because we’ve never had a technology so powerful & transformative. The bad news is that it will destroy everything, but that’s inevitable because the only way to prevent it is to stop feeding the Machine money, so
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the only Olympic gymnastics that matter
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There should be a political party that aligns perfectly with my incoherent and uninformed belief system, and the reason there’s not is everybody else is brainwashed into making decisions based on the choices they're given
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there’s never been anyone less likely to die of natural causes than Pete Hegseth
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I Used A Drip Coffee Maker To Make Soup. Here’s Why That Means Drip Coffee Makers Will Replace Every Household Appliance:
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We seriously gotta learn the difference between “I got Ai to do a thing” and “Ai is useful for doing a thing.” It’s not our job to figure out what their product is
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we’ve advanced from “how to I get coffee” to “how do I get tacos.” Ai technology is changing the world
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she’s a ten but she loves clogging and is totally into Satan, which makes her a twenty
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he is Rison
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No relation
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free refills? we don’t do that anymore. 24-episode tv seasons? we don’t do that anymore. cheeseballs (cocaine mixed with cheese)? we don’t do that anymore
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good, bad, or indifferent, this is truly the golden age of “we don’t do that anymore”
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just another day on BlueSky: The Everything is Difficult App
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Return of the Curse of the Creature's Revival of Americana Nostalgia
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it takes the wisdom of a 19-year-old cofounder to understand that the only way to revive Nostalgia For Americana is with a new country music bar. the kids are alright
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nobody wants to work for their inheritance anymore
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nothing but respect for the wonderful people of Minnesota, but this is not okay
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I think I speak for everyone over the age of 37 when I say that I would much rather spend an evening scheduling date-night trapeze classes than attending a date-night trapeze class
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Ai is a transformative technology that will disrupt industries, explode productivity, and unleash true human potential by freeing us from the burden of scheduling date-night trapeze classes
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trenchless parking garages
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I actually think there’s at least a 70% chance that this happened to Jd vance
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perfect example. "ufo's are actually demons" isn't Being Stupid™, it's being a dumbass, a subtle difference which someone as unskilled and juiceless as Jd vance will never be able to understand. one of the worst to ever do it
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freedom of speech is me being allowed to say “Facebook is a website for perverts” on the evening news
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you’re allowed to say that Facebook is a website for perverts because otherwise Mark Zuckerberg has to prove in court that Facebook is Not a website for perverts, which he definitely can’t since Facebook is a website for perverts
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I voted for the Permanent Violent Chaos candidate because he told me that all the violent chaos that happened the last time he was president was somebody else’s fault, and the only way to keep more violent chaos from happening was to vote for him, the Permanent Violent Chaos candidate, again
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a loser country. for losers
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cursive handwriting should not only be kept out of our schools, it should be illegal and completely banned. we don’t need two alphabets for one alphabet. Governor Shapiro needs to take my class and learn about Being Stupid™ the right way
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haha just kidding, I’m just a regular guy with normal everyday opinions, posting online. also been hearing the new Mandalorian movie is “dope”
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