Jesus Christ @jesushchr1st.bsky.social

Yep, I'm the real deal! (would be verified if it happens) Here to get my flock back on track and start dealing justice again. 🪽💙

Fuck MAGA, Nazis, and people who follow crap like that.

go.bsky.app/NBTt8f9

It's been a long time in the making but here is my first ever starter pack!

Vetted and endorsed by yours truly, Jesus Christ
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I'm back but holy fuck I don't want to be. Real talk, someone's gotta take 47 down.
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Don't ever forget that no matter what happens in this world, you can always count on Republicans to be evil cowards. Case in point from 2022/2023
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Almost time for my annual 3 day hibernation and honestly this time I might just stay in that cave.
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Can I say something without everybody getting mad?
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The white house is trying to remove this from the internet.

Follow in my footsteps children and repost far and wide!
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If half the people who went out to the NKP3 participated in a general or limited spending strike, the Pedo would be in prison or in the dirt within 3 days.

We have the people power, now we need to use it to our advantage!

Look when the general strike starts and do what you can.
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March 28th is quickly approaching.

I hope you all have your shit together enough to get out and protest!
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Vote early in your local elections especially come November and please check the status of your voter registration so you can re-register if needed before the deadline!

This admin will pull some fuckery so stay on your toes!
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TMIF

Thank Me It's Friday
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It's almost time for the annual Deity poker game.

I hope @riversidecasino.bsky.social is ready and they've removed the salmonella from the Mac n cheese buffet this year.
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Talked with mother nature and for thosr of us in PA, after these next two weeks you might want to think about getting your gardens going.

She said she'll calm down with the snow and cold but only if we are alright with a shit ton of rain.
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Become a certified minister, talk about me for 15mins with 3 or more people once a week, make your house a place of worship, then stop paying taxes to this bullshit government.
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People say that meteorologists have an easy job because they can be wrong all the time and still be employed.

I think think it's time to adjust that because Fox News has the same reliability but at least when a weatherperson gets it wrong the worst that happens is I have an umbrella for no reason.
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To get leaders to listen, all it used to take was turning a walking stick into a snake. Now we can't even do it with millions of pages of files specifically pointing out one man's contribution to committing horrible acts against children...
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Keep seeing posts about scrubs on TV, war in the middle east, $4/gal gas, new creed album, and potential market crisis harkening us back to 2008/2009 and if that's what's going on then I think it might be time to put like $20 into bitcoin again.
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Me: *lays out bread* this is my body

Apostles: weird but we get it

Me: *put out wine* this is my blood

Apostles: strange but it's booze so good

Me: *lays out 12" sausage* and this is my...

Apostles: at least make it believable!

Judas: *cuts it down to 3"*

Me: *squints angrily* betrayer!
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I was going to post something funny but then I saw Noem was fired and knew nothing would top that today.
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Gas went up 30¢ overnight but luckily the Popemobile runs on thoughts and prayers and that energy source is just-a-booming thanks to the insanity of this administration.
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If you're interested in the current state of the US economy, we sold the Arc of the Covenant to a Game Stop in Indiana for $33 store credit and a free FunkoPop of Edward Scissorhands.
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Please stop asking me to take the wheel.

I've gotten so many requests that the Holy Spirit has had to give some rides and he's extremely unhinged in a motor vehicle.
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I don't understand why you mortals are all upset with the way our Angels look.

They need to be able to watch over all of you and the best way we could do that is to make them entirely out of eyeballs.

I'm failing to understand the issue here.
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Reposted by Jesus Christ
momcjl.bsky.social's profile picture
🦋MOM🦋 @momcjl.bsky.social
1mo
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Turning water into wine or fish to bread is no longer the awesome thing it used to be. Turning pedos into compost and the US government back into an honored system of true checks and balances is the new hot trick.
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When the caskets start coming home full of our fallen soldiers, I hope the maga parents at their kids funerals don't ask me why they had to go early but instead thank Donald Trump and let everyone know it's what they voted for.
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We all know tonight is going to be filled with lies and calls of violence from the most pathetic little cunt to ever grace humanity in the last 70 years.

Instead, watch a comfort show then check the clips on Wed. morning to save whatever sanity you've got left.

8647 #ImpeachRemoveConvict
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Heaven is running a late Presidents Day deal where if you punch 10 Nazis in the face you get to hit the fast pass line to heaven. If you punch 40 you get in no questions asked.
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If you're going to a protest and need a sign, feel free to print this out to show those cowards:

ICE, DHS, CBP, and anyone else affiliated with this administration will NOT be getting into heaven and your family will be deported to Hell if they aren't already there.
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Anyone know how to get in contact with protest organizers in Minnesota? I've tried emails and DMs to @50501minnesota.bsky.social and the wider @50501movement.bsky.social but haven't heard anything back. Trying to make a donation of some physical goods.
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I'm an anti-ice account
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