Dorian Hart @dorianhart.bsky.social

Connoisseur of fine dad jokes.

Author of the Heroes of Spira epic fantasy series, starting with The Ventifact Colossus.

www.amazon.com/dp/B077LBHV92

Game designer: System Shock 1 & 2, Thief, BioShock

Dad, husband, board gamer, RPG player, hiker. He/him

I've got some Epic Fantasy™ for you. Complete, light-hearted five-book series that includes, among other stuff: flawed-but-lovable characters, evil math-priests, an enchanted tower, a 9'-tall oracular toad, an unflappable butler, a snarky cat, and a ghostly spy grandma.

www.amazon.com/dp/B077LBHV92
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One Thing In One Place At A Very Specific Time
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That's very kind!

I have a finished epic fantasy series: The Heroes of Spira. It's got, among other stuff: flawed-but-lovable characters, evil math-priests, an enchanted tower, a 9'-tall oracular toad, an unflappable butler, a snarky cat, and a ghostly spy grandma.

www.amazon.com/dp/B077LBHV92
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(But, seriously, being compared to THREE OF MY FAVORITE BOOKS AT ONCE has really made my day!)
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Recent comment about one of my books:

"If you love DnD influenced books like Spiderlight, Iconoclasts by Mike Shel or Kings of The Wyld then you will probably love this one. I am surprised it only got 53 ratings on Goodreads since 2017!"

If you knew how little self promo I do, you wouldn't be! 😛
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I'm going with a Dr. Who episode, but *not* modern.

I was a HUGE Who fanatic in high school. Loved Pertwee, loved T.Baker, loved Davison, meh on C.Baker... and then (for me) the McCoy episode "Delta and the Bannermen" was so bad it turned me off the show until the reboot 18 years later.
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Hey, did you know that in addition to my fantasy novels, I've also written some short stories, several of which have won (smallish) awards?

You can read a story about wishes/fate, one about Santa Claus, and 2 (non-fic) stories about my kids' near-death experiences!

dorianhart.com/shorter-works/
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I am "grocery stores are playing the music of my teens" years old, and I'm not sure how to feel about it.

On the one hand, I'm actually enjoying grocery store music. But on the other hand...

👴⌛🪦
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This site needs a break. Post 3 good things, none of which are the cessation of a negative.

1. Realizing you've lost track of time while reading a book, and then you keep reading anyway.

2. Playing board games w/ good friends.

3. When your kid loves a thing you love and is better than you at it.
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I once won a contest for the best poem about 3.5e D&D written in the style of Dr. Seuss.

I also nearly killed myself as a 4-year-old by stabbing myself in the neck with a rocking chair. Missed my carotid by 1/8", so I've been told.
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Marc Iavaroni. Though I was a big Sixers fan in the 80's, so he'll never be obscure in my heart!
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I know it's very likely that tonight's SotU will be mostly unhinged ranting, grievances, and lies.

But there's a chance it will be > 50% *cleanly* delivered grievances and lies.

In which case, what's the over/under on number of mainstream outlets afterward lauding the president's "change in tone?"
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I'm a 56-year-old vanilla-white dude, and I thought the Bad Bunny Super Bowl performance was an absolute delight, beginning to end. I can't even remember the last time I sat and watched an entire halftime show.

(And I was extra happy to learn that couple actually got married as it happened!)
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While out driving with with my wife today, we noticed that about one in every 10-20 street lamps on the highway had an odd attachment like a capped nozzle. Do any of my followers know what they are?
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Looking for ways to spend your holiday lucre?

I have a finished epic fantasy series featuring flawed but lovable characters going on increasingly perilous adventures, peeling back onion-layers of plot as they quest to save everyone they love.

(Also, all books on KU!)

www.amazon.com/dp/B077LBHV92
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My 20-yr-old, while watching Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, noted that Sean Connery looked a lot like me: bald, glasses, graying beard.

It also turns out I'm about the same age now (56) as Connery was then (57): OLD ENOUGH TO BE INDIANA JONES'S DAD HOW CAN THAT BE POSSIBLE JUST BURY ME ALREADY
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I will never knowingly use any LLM/AI in my writing process, research, editing, or output. It's both unethical and counterproductive.

The closest I have/will come is when the MS Word red underline squiggle reminds me that I'm incapable of spelling "bureaucracy" correctly on the first try.
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In the earliest days of the "67" phenomenon, I saw an explanation for it in two unconnected places. It was.. not a traditionally kid-friendly origin, one involving a nearby and more famously meme'd two-digit number.

But since it's hit the mainstream? Never heard that again. Am I imagining things?
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"Nintendo 64 turns 30 in 2026. The console you spent countless hours huddled around as a kid..."

No, that was the Atari 2600, which I'll have you know was a big step up from our Apple II. Now please excuse me as I finish turning into that guy from Last Crusade after he drank from the wrong Grail.
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OMG THIS GAME. I can only imagine the multiple hearts attacks Dodgers and Jays fans are having right now.
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If, like me, you are a fan of both Percy Bysshe Shelley's Ozymandias and Philip Larkin's This Be The Verse, you will recognize this mashup as one of the greatest achievements in the history of the Internet.
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My daughter hand-draws maps on commission, and her most recent -- depicting Terry Pratchett's Discworld -- is amazing!
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Imagining this exchange from, say, 10 years ago:

"in 2025 a player is going to get on base NINE TIMES in a single game in the World Series."

"Whoa! That's hard to believe. Are you sure you're not making th-"

"And that same dude is going to be his team's starting pitcher THE NEXT DAY."
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It's odd how divorced NFL box-scores can be from the actual score.

In the Rams v. Jags game, the Jaguars had more yards (358-271), and more yards/play. The teams had identical 3rd-down conversion rates, neither team committed any turnovers, and time of possession was very close.

Rams 35, Jags 7.
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I don't know how I missed until two minutes ago that @alixeharrow.bsky.social was releasing a new book (The Everlasting, out on 10/28), but when I found out, I called my local indie bookstore to pre-order so fast, there's still smoke rising off my phone.
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Patriots fans watching Mac Jones in 2025
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Do you read self-published fantasy novels?

If you've read the Heroes of Spira books and particularly enjoyed them, I encourage you to vote.

If you've read other such books you like, I also encourage you to vote. 🙂 Whoever are your favorites, show them some love!

www.reddit.com/r/Fantasy/comments/1nbw7ve/big_list_rfantasys_top_selfpublished_novels/
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Dear cookbook whose lasagne recipe instructs me to "sprinkle" ricotta cheese:

Have you *met* ricotta cheese?

Do you have a recipe somewhere that invites me to dust lightly with whole watermelons? Or drizzle with a baguette?

🤪
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...and you're fine with it being mostly fun and light-hearted even though some awful things happen, and also

- You're down for evil math-priests, a 9' tall oracular toad, an unflappable butler, a snarky cat, talking gemstones, and a ghostly spy grandma...

Here you go!

www.amazon.com/dp/B077LBHV92
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I want to find the right readers for my epic fantasy series, so if you want:

- a characters-first series starring an ensemble cast of good-hearted misfits, and also

-a peel-back-onion-layers story that will *feel* like the greatest 15-year-long D&D campaign you’ve ever heard of or experienced...
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