whip-smart and box-of-hammers-stupid
something something simpsons reference

patreon: no
substack: hard no

all respect to waffle house, you guys are the best and don't ever change

also, don't hire @senmullin.bsky.social
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hey @senmullin.bsky.social since you think violence is the way to settle ideological disputes, guess what? you don't deserve to run a department of the federal government. hell, you wouldn't get hired for ANY JOB IN THIS COUNTRY with that attitude.

that said, waffle house is accepting applications.
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at 13, i was reading douglas adams. "ah, the 'don't panic' one," you might say. "that seems age-appropriate. surely there's nothing ironic or subversive or revelatory about the witlessness or fecklessness of politicians or bureaucrats in that guy's work."

"ah," i reply. "so you've read it."
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one of the best things about joining this shared-grief-a-thon-slash-meme-measuring-contest of a website is learning the New Journalism baton not only survived COVID but has been passed from Tom Wolfe to Tom Junod to an entirely non-Tom whose work i today-appropriately turn green with envy as i read
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timeline cleanse
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statue of liberty every year from ages 6-12
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Reposted by briween
lisaguerrero.bsky.social's profile picture
First woman to win in this category. First black person to win in this category. First Filipino to win in this category. HISTORIC.
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incredibly tickled that Steven Toast is doing the voice over announcements for the Oscars
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looking at you @clairewillett.bsky.social but no pressure i gotta earn it i guess but i don't know how
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TRUE FACT: in the 1940s, to "rub one out" meant to snuff or kill someone and now it means something HO BOY way different
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i hate when an account i like to read doesn't let me comment, i just want to tell you how much i admire your work
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all the bullshit in DC is officially backed up all the way to the airport
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for all the talk about how "unserious" some figures are in tech and politics and journalism etc., there is not nearly enough talk about how painfully incurious those same wastoids are
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the original is already great but limited by the technology of its time, and the sequel deftly expands its narrative depth

whatever come at me
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seems like a good scoop for @aftermath.site what do you guys think you up to this
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someone call haim saban and get those names JFC
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TIL that the artists who rap the Mario Brothers Rap at the beginning of the Super Mario Brothers Super Show are UNCREDITED WHAT THE HELL
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stephen colbert is, simply put, the most deeply decent and wickedly funny class act i have ever had the great good fortune to watch on television. his commitment to his colleagues and to his craft is unparalleled.
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my manager just sent me a slack msg from the future and now i'm worried i've entered a final destination-type situation where i should just quit my job and move to spain
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Reposted by briween
briween.bsky.social's profile picture
we have become almost exclusively a world of Salieris* and that's brought us to a time where we need Mozarts more than ever to undo the damage

*this is an imperfect metaphor as Salieri was devastatingly aware of his mediocrity, while today's Salieris are anything but
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TIL a defense company that was shamelessly named after a sword in the works of notoriously anti-war WWI veteran jrr tolkien is run by temu keenan feldspar

all of existence in 2026 is a fart imitating art imitating life
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just heard a 12 year old remark to another 12 year old that he was having "vietnam flashbacks" at a farmer's market and it gave me the ick

hey i have an idea let's retire that whole trope who's with me
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Longlegs: Lost in New York
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in fairness to @nealkatyal.bsky.social i did spell his first name incorrectly

but in fairness to me i don't see anyone else trying to get him to the burn for free so it's about time
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ha, good thing us americans have--

*remembers president bush and also president bush*

ah fuck
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ohhh fish it's only tuesday
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Reposted by briween
briween.bsky.social's profile picture
ok no i am having too much fun with this
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shah it
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it's a mad, mad, mad, mad max: fury road
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every day is another confirmation that time travel will never happen because someone would have come back to redirect some of these motherfuckers by now

you may interpret "redirect" any way you wish
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