Unfortunately, when you argue with people about sexual violence enough, you realize there are way too many people who believe that the reason it happens so much is because victims aren’t good enough at stopping it.

April 11, 2026 - 22:07 UTC

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It’s hard to process that you (we) still have to fight this. Frustrating that they have never experienced it even secondhand, or have been complete dicks when hearing the story from others. And that they’ve never chosen to learn even a little about it.
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For fuck's sake.
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I guess I shouldn't be surprised that my conversations on X today revolved around what "consent" and "drunkenness" are. There is a lot of misinformation out there - I'm only familiar with CA law so I can't speak to a NY situation - but even the "common sense" about these matters is uncommon.
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yes that is how we are programmed. i’d love to see a study of how pop culture grooms female children into “knowing” that it’s their job to fix the angry boy, and that the more he yells and insults you the more he loves you
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Ah, so basically, "skill issue". Idiots.
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aka Women don’t have the right to get blind drunk. Only men get to go that. Let’s make alcohol illegal for women while you take away our vote and our control over our bodies. That’s perfect, thx.
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Those people are commonly known as Neanderthals.
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When my girlfriend was murdered, I lost count of people who offered "sympathy" in the form of "too bad she didn't know how to defend herself". Wild assumption that she didn't KNOW something to start with. But more to the point, too bad so many men rape and murder and we still blame victims💔
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It's up to women to imagine every loathesome situation and avoid it.
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The easiest way to end sexual violence is for people to quit doing sexual violence.
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I cannot hit "like" on this post but I absolutely want to acknowledge the pont.
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We live in a rape culture.
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Preach
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There's little more to expect from a nation that tolerates the unregulated second amendment.
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What an odd thing to say. Misogyny is not uniquely American.
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Absolutely guarantee whatever place you are from doesn’t believe women any better than America and may well be worse.
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It's like #metoo never happened!
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At that point in the conversation, I lick my finger & make play like I'm aiming for their ass. "Think you can stop me?" I say & the dudes HATE it.

They understand rape when it's their OWN ass in question.
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Truly, so much of this discourse boils down to shifting the burden of stopping sexual violence onto the victims instead of, you know, the people who commit acts of sexual violence. Let alone the institutions and people who enable them.
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A frickin' men Kat 💯
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Your last sentence about the people and institutions who enable it is key. A number of people including in the reporting on the Swalwell allegations share that this pattern of predatory behavior on his part were essentially an open secret in DC and here in California.
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Still? Really? Fucking hell
Never got theft. Never for a man getting smacked. Never for anything but sexual violence. We are vile. People I mean. Us men mostly, but our species is vile.
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After the Pelicot trial, I lost count of the number of men - men I knew - who tried to justify what the perpetrators had done with blurry notions of ‘it might have been…’, ‘maybe they…’

51 men were convicted.
No ifs, no maybes.
Shame must change sides.
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Or they became victims for the massive payouts they get.
Or they were willing participants who subsequently changed their minds and are trying to cover their shame as fallen women - with publicity.
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Does. Not. Happen.
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Fuck off.
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Just world fallacy strikes again
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UGH WHY
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That's a chilling reality. It's time to shift the focus from victim-blaming to perpetrator accountability.
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But even then- even when the victims are children they look for ways to blame disqualify their victimization. Example: Epstein Victims vs the entire fucking world at this very moment.
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This is absolutely true, but it’s also true that these men run a series of screening tests (i.e., grooming) and I don’t think teaching young women how to spot and fail those tests is victim blaming.
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By way of example, Larry Summers Epstein correspondence details how he has a meltdown after his mark says she is too tired to have a drink with him. We aren’t reading about how she was torn between giving him the benefit of the doubt; she had that tactic at the ready.
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Yes, it's precisely because men aren't going to stop and the male-dominated justice system is not going to hold them accountable, that we as women must collectively build safety for ourselves, our daughters, and our sisters. It seems that *only* we can stop them.
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I honestly think a lot of pretty much every problem we have today has to do with too many people not wanting to do… anything. If they blame the victim, they don’t have to confront anyone or make efforts to change things. Certain ideologies are all about not making an effort to do better by others.
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We're a pretty sick and srewed-up society.
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